My family has Nachos every Monday night. We call it Nacho Monday. We have done this for years. I don’t know how I did it, but one night I prepared the nachos as usual and forgot… you guessed it… the cheese. How could I? Was I going crazy?!?!? A simple meal that I have made every Monday for years and I forget cheese to put cheese on the chips?!?!?!? Well, I learned something that day. Sometimes when life is CRAZY (3 kids, dogs, husband, work, housework, pta, etc.) it is easy to forget the simple things that are necessities in life! My hubby and I had a talk… because he thought maybe I was going crazy too!!! We discussed and decided that from then on I would use the recipe book for every meal. Even the little mundane ones.
This was actually harder than I thought it would be. Who wants to get out a recipe book to make cereal, eggs, grape juice? I sure didn’t!!!! I had a really hard time with this for a while. I thought, I should be able to make simple recipes. If you ask my hubby would tell you, I had this attitude of being “above” using the recipe book. I would have to constantly remind myself that I forgot cheese on nachos. (Now if that isn’t a huge slap of humility… I don’t know what is?) So, I kept on getting the recipe book out for every meal.
As I was doing this I realized that I had an issue with preparing meals. I thought I could do them all by myself. (Sounds like a spoiled child right?) I also learned that nachos were not the only meals that I would screw up! I cut corners on all meals!!! Instead of a tablespoon of sugar for a recipe I would add 2 tablespoons one time then the next time a different amount. I learned that my lack of consistency was the reason why nothing turned out the same in my meals. This actually caused strain on my marriage, because my hubby LOVES food. When I found a dish that he loved, fine-tuned it to perfection and then got him all excited that I was going to make it for him and then didn't follow the recipe, it wouldn't turn out. Then he was mad with disappointment. I would sometimes think, “He should be grateful I cooked him food.” But in actuality, I like cooking for him and if I am cooking for him… shouldn’t I make it for him, the way he likes it?
As I was realizing all these things with my cooking I realized that life is like this as well. We go about our days with various tasks and try to accomplish it all. But what is “it all”, and where is “it all” going to take us? What are we running around mad for? Is it to get everything done? Is it to make ends meet? And how often do we cut corners or forget the purpose for which we're doing things? I realized that without direction in life our lives would turn out like nachos… with no cheese on them. If we are even that lucky. If we don’t have direction we are like leaves blowing in the wind. We will end up where the wind takes us. Or with whatever was in the fridge. I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to end up like rotten milk!
The good news is we can choose to follow whichever recipe we want in life. We are not the first people to live this life, and even though all our circumstances are different from one another’s, they are similar enough that we can use the ingredients we see others use to have similar outcomes. Maybe our cooking utensils and ovens are different in life, or circumstances, but we can use what behavior patterns have worked for others in order to produce a similar outcome.
So, what do you want in life? Do you want to have a happy marriage? Do you want to have a six figure income? Do you want to never worry about money? Then do what people with happy marriages do. Do what people with six figure incomes do. Do what people that don’t worry about money do!!!
Now comes the big question…. How do I do what those people do?!?!? Well, you wouldn’t try to make Ella’s Banana Bars without first asking her for the recipe would you? Yes, it might be scary to ask someone what they have done to have a happy marriage, six figure income, or never worry about money, but reverse the roles for a second. When someone asks you for a recipe of a meal or treat that you have prepared how do you feel? I can tell you I feel GREAT!!!!! I feel great, because someone likes my cooking, something I prepared, something I spent my time on. When they ask me how I did it, I take that as a HUGE complement and love sharing how I did it. Now having a happy marriage, six figure income, and never worrying about money is different than a dessert recipe, but do you really think they spent less time on preparing that happy marriage, six figure income, or never worry about money? Or do you think they spent more? How much more of a complement is asking going to be to the person you are asking? Don’t be afraid to ask!!!!
Once you have the recipe, or you asked the person how they did it, don’t think you are “above” following it!!! The recipe might be simple, and I bet a few of the items that these people tell you really will be extremely simple. The trick is not to let yourself prepare nachos without the cheese. Follow the recipe!!! If you need to write a to do list every day, then do it!
This life is a gift and you can choose to shape/mold this life into whatever you want. Make sure you have the right recipe for what you want, and don’t be afraid or to stubborn to follow it in order for it to turn out right.
About this Author: De Kinsey is the co-owner/manager of LIFE 1010™. She worked as a licensed residential and commercial escrow officer for over 5 years. This experience helped her learn how to analyze and understand legal documents and translate them in a way the general public could understand. De Graduated from Utah Valley University in Psychology and in Community Health Science. She understands how a person’s psyche and personal health can have positive and/or negative impact on their LIFE and financial well being. She brings this knowledge into the LIFE 1010™ program.